...you've literally spent the last 90+ days with someone and then one day you don't see them at all.
Now there has been a 24 hour period when I haven't seen him, but that day I saw him in the morning and the next day I saw him at night, so technically I've seen him everyday since May 18. The beginning of the most interesting friendship I've ever had.

But now, here I am without him and his life force. He makes me feel like I'm actually living and now I feel dead. Or at least like he is. He's out in the country where he doesn't get reception, so I have to wait for him to call. Which he rarely does because he had to spend all night in the ER with his godmother. So, he's hurting, and I'm hurting that he's hurting. And who comforts me when I'm hurt? HIM! And vice versa.

I'm also house sitting to make sure that his roommate (AKA my brother, his personal assistant) doesn't do anything crazy or stupid in or to the house. I don't trust my brother so I slept here, like I do practically every night. Only difference is, my friend is not here. I'm sleeping by myself in his huge bed. I might as well be his widow because that's what it feels like, left looking at his clothes, his bed...

Chatting on IM doesn't change the feelings. I'd rather feel his arms around me as I sleep, hear him breathing when I wake up in the middle of the night. I'd rather see his face when I wake up in the morning, instead of sleeping by myself for another night.

Tags: life
Current Location: my own sniffles
Current Mood: lonely